Whale names were supposedly used by both Maoris and Europeans for various New Zealand cities, rivers, and ski fields. While some monuments are simply absurdly long, others can be seen as amusing from an English-speaking perspective. Similarly, the meanings of several Maori names are intriguing. Don’t you wish you were from the town of “Burnt Penis”? Anyway, enjoy these amusing New Zealand landmarks!
Before we begin, please remember that this piece is meant to be a joke, not to disrespect any culture or location; it is simply in the spirit of having a little fun with the simple things. Please don’t take anything too seriously; it’s only for entertainment purposes.
Whakapapa – Hilarious Place Names in New Zealand
Whakapapa is a town and ski field on Mount Ruapehu’s slopes. Because ‘Wh’ is pronounced ‘f’ in Maori, the ski field indicates sexual conduct with one’s parents when said by an English speaker. Rest confident that Whakapapa means genealogy in Maori.
Taumatawhakatangihangakoa uauotamateaturipukakapikimanga horonukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu
It is the world’s longest landmark, with 85 letters! Check out the signage in Porangahau, Hawke’s Bay, for yourself. Why not make it your new email password?
Whakahoro – Hilarious Place Names in New Zealand
Regarding fishing, this is more acceptable because it is part of the job description. Whakahoro is situated on the outskirts of the magnificent Whanganui National Park.
Hooker Valley
No, this is not a pickpocket’s valley. Still, it’s a fantastic climb in Aoraki Mt Cook National Park.
Hump Ridge Trail
More sexual overtones… This time in simple English.
Waipu
Why do we poop? We’re not sure, but Waipu is a lovely coastal town in Northland, not far from some of New Zealand’s best free glowworm burrows.
Foulwind Cape – Hilarious Place Names in New Zealand
We like to think someone stole it when they named it. Locals believe this is because this cape receives winds from Australia. Captain Cook, a British adventurer, named the cape after seeing strong winds off its coastlines.
River Tutaekuri
This Maori term translates to ‘dog s**t’ in English.
Tarawera Mountain
According to our guide, some people translate “Tarawera” as “Burning Spear,” while others describe it as “Burning Vagina.”
Te Urewera (New Zealand)
Te Urewera translates to “single genitals” or “burnt penis” after a Maori story about a chief sleeping too close to a fire.
Point Shag
You already know where to go… It simply provides a goofy photo opportunity.
Things Not Many People Know About New Zealand
